This week’s Friday Five — Five bizarre things narcissists have said to Aunt Alex:
1. You are a FAKE!
2. Who are you talking about on that website? Nobody acts like that.
3. Your ‘Blame Game’ approach helps no one, Lady.
4. You think you’re a know-it-all about narcissists? Takes one to know one, doesn’t it?
5. Just another hate site. Bite me, hater “auntie”.
Aunt Alex didn’t get the Friday Five out as expected. So, here we are:
Six Ways to Leave Your Narcissistic “Lover”
1. Just get out.
3. Run, don’t walk.
4. Never look back.
5 Don’t bother leaving a “Dear John” letter.
6. Feel free to take any of his pets with you as a humanitarian rescue effort, unless they’re as psychotic as he is. If he balks later, tell him they must have escaped his BS when they saw the going was good, just like everyone else.
This Week’s Friday Five: Five Ways to Get Rid of an Uninvited Narcissist Visitor
1. Tell him he looks fat in those pants.
2. Ask him if the reason he’s here is because he’s already bored everyone else to death.
3. Ask him if he has the money he owes you.
4. Tell him you’re glad he’s here, because the elderly lady down the road needs her lawn mowed. Call her in front of him, and tell her he offered.
5. Never, ever underestimate the beauty of mace.